When you experience the love of God in a personal, intimate way, you can't help but share it with others. At least that's how I felt when I finally realized that all this time God has been constantly lavishing His love on me. But sometimes, unfortunately, we tend to be stubborn and want to go our own way, resulting in us ignoring the love of God. This usually leads to us trying to find that love, that no one else in the world could ever come close to being, in other people and things. And that always leads to heartbreak and disappointment.
Anytime in my life that I have let something become so important to me that it takes away from my relationship with God, it has always ended up vanishing or crumbling right before my eyes. It's sad to say that this has happened more than once, that I have put these other things first, but thankfully God is so gracious and merciful to us. He never fades, even when we have tried everything and everyone else in the world to fill that love we are desiring deep in our hearts, He still stands there with arms wide open.
The Lover that never runs. The Lover that never fails, never says things are too difficult or that it's too hard to stick around, the Lover that is always consistent and relentless in His pursuit of our hearts and His love for us. That Lover is my sweet Jesus.
So why do I keep coming back to talking about the perfect love of God? Because I literally cannot breathe, I cannot sing, dance, walk, move, live without His love. Like I said before, I have sadly more than once or twice in my life tried to fill the craving for a deeper relationship with God in my life with other things, mainly other people and relationships... Which has led to a lot of confusion and heartbreak. Yet every time after I had done this, our Heavenly Father was still standing there waiting for me, saying, "Are you done yet, Daughter? Because I miss you and I want you to come home and to be with me."
A few months ago I was engaged. Long story short, I am no longer engaged because God has set me towards a different direction at this time in my life. But I had put so much into this relationship, so much of my identity in becoming this perfect, fairytale bride, a wife that I had lost sight of my Savior, I had begun to drift away from my first love. And in this idea of my love story being like a fairytale, God revealed something to me.
You see, we aren't just the princess locked away in the tower, a lot of times we are the fire-breathing dragon. We are the one who lashes out at our Rescuer, we try to keep Him out with all our might and in our ugliness and combativeness, the Rescuer still fights for us, He doesn't give up. Ever.
And, sorry ladies, but that rescuer isn't the cute guy you've been eyeing during praise and worship at church. And we ourselves can't be the rescuer, we aren't able to save ourselves when we don't even realize we need saving.
Our true Rescuer, the only one Who can slay the hatred and pain in our hearts, Who can wipe away every past mistake and sin, Who can demolish all the wreckage and heartbreak and fill us with peace, hope, joy, and love beyond understanding is God. The only real Rescuer.
Stop running, brothers and sisters. Stop fighting away the love your soul needs. Stop trying to find something or someone else to fill the gap in your heart, to save you. Earthly love was never meant to save you anyways. Only the everlasting, unending love of Jesus will do that.
Take time to rest in the love of Jesus today. Make it a date. A time of just you and Him in the secret place. Let Him overwhelm your heart with His pursual of you and love for you. All you gotta do is be still and be with the Loving Rescuer.
"Israel, the Lord who created you says, “Do not be afraid—I will save you. I have called you by name—you are mine. When you pass through deep waters, I will be with you; your troubles will not overwhelm you. When you pass through fire, you will not be burned; the hard trials that come will not hurt you. For I am the Lord your God, the holy God of Israel, who saves you. I will give up Egypt to set you free; I will give up Ethiopia and Seba. I will give up whole nations to save your life, because you are precious to me and because I love you and give you honor. Do not be afraid—I am with you!" Isaiah 43:1-5